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summer dark

by alaska, KT

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1.
03:23
2.
06:53
3.
04:52

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released September 6, 2016

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alaska, KT Bar Harbor, Maine

feels like I'm a home
frantically searching for
a ghost

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Track Name: bar island
hiked into darkness
out on bar island
paths were dissolving
tides they were rising

seven hours tangled up
in the trash and my own shit
really wondering if I’d freeze to death

the night sky is clear
there’s so many stars, I can’t count em
she told me “no fear”
and I’ve got no other options

anyway
now
Track Name: monochrome
i’m just a heap
of dirt and seeds
aching for something
to grow out of me

feels like I’m
a home
frantically searching for
a ghost

seems I’m
a son
wishing I
was born a woman

not this awkward pastiche
I wanna grow life
inside of me
I wanna let down
these boundaries
I wanna erase
my identity

yeah, there’s times when I try to be monochrome
do my best to let those colors alone
yeah, there’s times when I wanna forget what I know
but I don’t know why
I can’t stop asking why

ever since I learned
to read
feels like every shape
has to have a meaning

the cacophony
makes me
keep crawling back in
to this bed
trapped in story
pullin covers
over my head

I need to scrap this 3 act play
but I struggle to write it any other way
stuck in rising action
whiplash
from spiritual contraction

yeah, there’s times when I try to be monochrome
why can’t I leave these questions alone?
yeah, there’s times when I try to forget what I know
but at least I never knew
why I can’t stop asking why
Track Name: new moon
you don’t have to function
this ain’t school
to me you’re an ocean
not a tool

I wanna pour myself into you
are you already full?

I know how I’m toxic
I hide my wounds
light fires, drink poison
under a new moon

I tried to be something to you
and just end up the fool

I tried to be something to you